A Precious Gift

When my dad was dying, my mom kept asking me what of his I wanted. I already had a painting that he had done (as all my sisters do). But there was nothing other than the painting that I really wanted. I kept saying that I have all of my dad that I need in my mind and in my heart. (Some would add "in my temperament.")

I retell his stories to both Pat and Nathaniel. "Moosehead in the trunk" anyone? How about the time that he got beat for nearly blinding his aunt while pretending to be the Three Stooges. Pick two, pick two... The time he made Uncle Arnold eat the ink stamper. Pennsylvania Rabbit. The turtle lady on his paper route. I thought that I had all that I needed.

When my mom was packing up the house that they shared, she gave me her hope chest. In the middle of it is a big worn spot. My dad made that by sitting on it every day for over 30 years while he was getting ready for work.

Yes, I have plenty to remember him by.

When he died last summer (how is it that i's almost a year already?), my mom asked again. What do you want of dad's? What do you want of dad's?

I have memories, I would tell her. Counting his fingers in church and marveling at the fact that there were five on each hand which made it so easy to count to ten. Christmas Parades. The first time I remember him saying he was proud of me (December 12, 2002 when I graduated with Honors from Trinity.) When he walked me down the aisle at my wedding. (I had asked him what he preferred to do. He told me he would be so proud to walk me.)

So again I say I have plenty to remember him by. But, does Nathaniel?

On Tuesday, my Mom came over to go computer shopping with Pat. She had brought a gift for Nathaniel. Not uncommon, given that it's my mom. She gave it to Pat with instructions to show it to me when I came home from work. I guess Mom was really excited for me to see it. She called around 4:30. Pat, being Pat, had completely forgotten about it. While I was on the phone with her, he went and got a small brown pouch and handed it to me. I couldn't imagine what could be inside a bag like that.

I opened it up and out came my dad's gold watch. I never imagined that it could be that. I instantly thought of all the places Nathaniel could wear it. HIs HS graduation. College Graduation. Maybe his wedding.

I stammered many thank yous to my mom, since I was just so surprised. But what she told me next left me speechless. (Pat was not, and if you've seen Pulp Fiction, the part with Christopher Walken, you know what he was saying.) The last timme my dad wore that watch was on my wedding day. I like to think that he was very happy that day and happy for me.

Nathaniel will never remember how soft Dad's hands always were. He'll never remember how hard Dad could laugh. Nathaniel will never see that they have the exact same big toe (although we will tell him). Now, he can have a physical reminder that he had a Bumpa, who loved him very much, even though their time together was all too short.